Big Trouble
by Naryathotep
Summary: A couple of scam artist get way more than expected after stealing from Wolfram and Hart.


FADE IN:

INT.BAR-NIGHT

The place is clearly packed tonight. There are drunks stumbling all around the bar. We see two guys seated at the front drinking together. They are JAMES and WILL. James has a slim yet athletic build and is wearing a dark green t-shirt with blue jeans and nikes. Will is a stocky guy who stands just a foot shorter than James, he is wearing a black leather jacket, black long-sleeved shirt, blue jeans and steel toe boots.

**JAMES**

_Ok, so what did she say?_

**WILL**

_Well, look man, she pretty much told me to fuck off._

**JAMES**

_What did she say?_

**WILL**

_She said that I wasn't willing to commit my life to a serious relationship. Said that I never wanted to do anything she wanted to._

**JAMES**

_Like what?_

**WILL**

_Sunny walks on the beach, picnics at noon, flying kites, shit the my delicate skin condition won't allow._

James and Will begin to laugh.

**JAMES**

_So she doesn't know you are a vampire?_

**WILL**

_Pretty much, that ain't exactly good info to be telling just anyone, especially since ninety percent of people don't believe in vampires and the ten percent that do are either crazy or have a high chance of staking you._

**JAMES**

_Yeah, I bet that does suck. I still say that their isn't much difference between you before and after you lost your soul._

**WILL**

_Plight of the amoral criminals...I mean i've been a cold bastard all my life. I don't whine near as much, that is about it._

**JAMES**

_Yeah, you are a lot more laid back now that you are undead._

Will looks at James.

**WILL**

_Just say the word man and I'll give you and that girlfriend of yours the same piece of mind._

**JAMES**

_Seriously, don't joke about that shit with me._

**WILL**

_You don't think I would actually kill you guys. I only eat people I don't like. Homeless people, crack heads, drug dealers, gang bangers, folks like that. I wouldn't kill my best friends._

**JAMES**

_What about Douglas?_

**WILL**

_He graduated with us, that don't make him good people. That date rapist had it coming._

**JAMES**

_What about the girl he was with?_

**WILL**

_Only a real degenerate would seriously date him. She had it coming just as hard. Plus I was still hungry and she was half passed out._

**JAMES**

_Degenerate, this coming from a talking corpse that drinks blood._

Will looks angry.

**WILL**

_You sound like you want to continue this moral discussion outside?_

**JAMES**

_You don't like it when people joke about stuff you're close to, do you?_

**WILL**

_You were fucking with me, man you suck. Shit you had me going for a second._

**JAMES**

_Come on dude, lets get out of here. It's getting late._

**WILL**

_Late for you, puny human._

**JAMES**

_Did you just quote The Hulk?_

**WILL**

_Yes I did, good sir. _

James shakes his head and laughs a bit.

**JAMES**

_Geek, I'll catch you later, don't kill anyone I know._

**WILL**

_See ya tomorrow, 7:00 pm._

James walks out of the bar.

INT.STREET-NIGHT

We see James walk towards his car, he is humming to himself as three men emerge from around his car. They are VAMPIRES.

**VAMPIRE#1**

_Not a good part of town for a human to be wandering in, is it?_

The other two stand beside James. He gives them a casual glance and makes eye contact with the leader.

**James**

_Great. I was almost scared that time_

**VAMPIRE#1**

_Really, we worked on it before we left. What do you think of the whole "one on each side" tactic?_

**JAMES**

_Well, I guess it's alright. You guys got our bag?_

**VAMPIRE#1**

_Yeah, it's all here. Took a hell of a lot to get that._

**JAMES**

_Speaking of that, weren't there eight of you guys?_

**VAMPIRE#1**

_The heist didn't go off as clean as desired._

**JAMES**

_Who did you guys steal this from anyway?_

INT.PARKING GARAGE-NIGHT

We see piles of dust and a few dead bodies laying around on the floor. A man is seated on the back of a ambulance, a paramedic is treating a wound on his forehead.

**HURT GUY**

_Motherfuckers just came out of nowhere, I don't..._

He looks up to see a man in a clean, freshly pressed suit walk up to him. He looks like the stereotypical corporate LAWYER.

**HURT GUY**

_You that cunt from that law firm?_

**LAWYER**

_Yes sir, I am Walter Adams, I am an associate with Wolfram and Hart._

**HURT GUY**

_You fucks said that this would go off without a hitch! Well two hours and five bodyguards latter, I would say you were pretty fucking wrong._

**LAWYER**

_I assume that your attackers were successful in their goal?_

**HURT GUY**

_You mean the 100,000 dollars and that crystal thing? Yeah, they swiped it as they escaped._

**LAWYER**

_You wouldn't happen to know who took said merchandise, would you?_

**HURT GUY**

_No._

Walter pulls out a silenced pistol and puts a round between the man's eyes.

The paramedics just scoop him into the ambulance and close the doors. One of the paramedics approaches Walter. The paramedic shifts his face into it's vampire form.

**VAMPIRE**

_Anything else, sir?_

**WALTER**

_Just__put him in the river, I handle the rest._

He pulls out a cell phone and punches in a number.

**WALTER**

_Sir, the drop was a failure._

Screaming can be heard on the other side of the phone, Walter doesn't even look worried.

**WALTER**

_I assure you that all steps are being taken to retrieve the stolen item._

Walter nods as the guy on the other line replies.

**WALTER**

_Yes, I know how much that artifact is worth. No sir, they took the payment as well. I know my head is on the line if it isn't found. Rest assured that I will find and retrieve the stolen property. _

**WALTER**

_Of course, whoever is responsible will never live to regret crossing Wolfram and Hart._

INT.ALLEY-NIGHT

The alley looks dark and foreboding, it is the last place anyone would want to be alone. Will walks down the alley without a care in the world.

He looks down at his pocket. His cell phone rings loudly, it breaks the eerie silence.

**WILL**

_Hello, oh hey Melissa, how are you?_

He nods as Melissa answers him.

**WILL**

_Me, The usual, dead and loving it._

He looks up to see a woman pass by the alley, she is jumped on by a man following her.

**WILL**

_Speaking of that, let me call you back._

The man shoves the woman against a brick wall. Her screams echo in the night air but no one is around to hear.

Will grabs the man by the face and throws him against the adjacent wall. The man is dazed from the impact. He tries to escape but stumbles.

**WOMAN**

_Thank you sir..._

Will turns to talk only to see the woman vamp out in front of him.

**WOMAN**

_Looks like it's two for one._

Will vamps out and looks at her, he seems semi-amused.

**WILL**

_Sorry, but one-liners are corny. I mean seriously, "two for one", who talks like that? You must be new at this._

**WOMAN**

_How do you figure that, fat boy?_

**WILL**

_There you go again, why? Anyway, I guessed that because most of the time we don't mistake each other for human._

**WOMAN**

Ugh, that guy is getting up.

Will just sends a quick punch to the man's face, he drops like a sack of potato's.

**WILL**

_Speaking of him..._

**WOMAN**

_Oh no, I had to dress up like this just to get that pervert to stalk me. It took me two hours just to get him to follow me here, he's mine._

**WILL**

_Well, I was the one who put him down..._

**WOMAN**

_So, like that means shit! Look, you didn't do half the work I had to do to get him. All you did was punch him out, I'd love to see you do this much work for a kill!_

**WILL**

_Work, dressed like that is like fishing with a grenade. All you had to do was strut around, someone was bound to follow you._

**WOMAN**

Hey!

**WILL**

He is mine, I took him down. There are plenty of other people out tonight, I suggest you find someone else.

The Woman answers by swinging at Will's jaw. The sucker punch connects and sends Will to the ground next to the would-be rapist.

**WOMAN**

Do yourself a favor, stay down.

Will grabs a broke board and jumps up. He growls loudly as he swings the makeshift club across the woman's face. It shatters and sends he spinning to the ground.

**WILL**

Are you just a walking cliché machine?

Will stabs the broken board through the woman's chest cavity before she can make a comeback to Will's statement.

He looks at the dazed rapist.

**WILL**

Now were we're we?

The rapist begins to twist and convulse. He jumps up and grabs Will by the neck. The man's eyes turn a bright green. His voice sounds like rusty nails on a chalkboard.

**RAPIST**

The case is the key! THE CASE IS THE KEY! Do not lose the KEY!

Will pushes the man off oh himself. A small blast of fire flies out of the rapist's eyes, leaving only hollow burned-out sockets. He falls to the ground and begins to melt.

WILL

Um...What the fuck?

To Be Continued...


End file.
